Set Apart

"The kingdom of darkness strives through pressure on the mind and the spirit, to neutralize, lead astray, and smooth down strong personalities so that they become apathetic about what is happening around them. [The Nazirite is not to be drunk with wine.] Drunkenness is not only from alcohol, but also from, for example, excessive television watching to a consuming interest in sports. Drugs, pornography, rich music, sport and other forms of entertainment all work together to pacify and neutralize nations, particularly young people. they create politically apathetic personalities, all in accordance with the deliberate plan from the kingdom of darkness. The more and longer a personality is controlled by the Holy Spirit the wider becomes his usefulness as an instrument. Some articles, says Paul, are for noble purposes and some for ignoble. 'If a man cleanses himself from the latter he will be an instrument for noble purposes, made holy, useful to the Master and prepared to do any good work. Flee the evil desires of youth' [2 Timothy 2:21-22]. A person who gives parts of his life to the influence of the kingdom of darkness does not, it is true, limit his eternal salvation, but he does limit his usefulness for the Lord's purpose... A special mission demands a special holiness."
-The Prophetic Church
by Kjell Skoberg

The Root of Self-Hatred

If you don't already know, I'm at One Thing in Kansas City, Missouri right now. Last night a man named Allen Hood BROUGHT IT and I HAVE to share! He approached the root of self-hatred as I've never heard it approached. Let's see if I can sum this up...

"I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your offspring and her offspring; he shall bruise your head, and you shall bruise his heel." Genesis 3:15

When man fell, God made it known that He was sending His son through a woman- through a human body. Out of a human body would come the incarnate God to CRUSH the great rebellion of Satan. Because of this, Satan HATES the human body. He hates it!! So what does he do? He defiles it with sickness, with hunger, with perversion. He loves to see us sin against our body with a poor body image, sexual immorality, self-destruction. He wants to see you hate your body like he does. And these lies have infiltrated our culture. Bathrooms have become false places of worship where Satan feeds us lies then steals our dignity. We need to stop spending so much time in front of the mirror and realize that we are letting a demon of fear speak to us about our identity and especially about our future spouse. We need to tear down alters and demonic powers from lies of the enemy. We need to renounce self-hatred in the name of Jesus and receive the blood of Jesus. It's time for us to bless our bodies. It's time to redeem our bathrooms by speaking His truth, His word and His praises that it might become a place of worship rather than of temptation. It's time to stop wearing rags and start wearing the robes of royalty!!

"The king will desire your beauty... All glorious is the princess in her chamber with robes interwoven with gold. In many colored robes she is led to the king... With joy and flatness they are led along as they enter the palace of the king." Psalm 45:11,13-15

False Identity vs True Identity

So God led me to Daniel today and right off the back something rocked my world. I wanted to share...

"Among these were Daniel, Hananiah, Mishael, and Azariah of the tribe of Judah. And the chief of the eunuchs gave them names: Daniel he called Belteshazzar, Hananiah he called Shadrach, Mishael he called Meshach, and Azariah he called Abednego." Daniel 1:6-7

So here's the fascinating thing about this. As I read that I began wondering what the Hebrew names and the new names meant. Gods been teaching me a lot about names lately (try asking God what He is calling you right now then look up the meaning of the name. It's fuuunn). So anyway I looked up the meanings and...

i. The name Daniel (meaning God is my judge) was changed to Belteshazzar (meaning Bel’s prince).
 
ii. The name Hannaniah (meaning Beloved by the LORD) was changed to Shadrach (meaning Illumined by Sun-god).
 
iii. The name Mishael (meaning Who is as God) was changed to Meshach (meaning Who is like Venus).
 
iv. The name Azariah (meaning The LORD is my help) was changed to Abed-Nego (meaning Servant of Nego).

Here's what I found fascinating. SATAN LOVES YOU SPEAK AN IDENTITY OVER YOU THAT IS THE EXACT OPPOSITE OF WHAT GOD HAS. If God calls you a prophet, Satan loves to curse your dreams and make you desire to be dreamless. When God calls you Beloved, Satan says "No, you need someone else to make you happy- to illuminate you." It's time to reject the false identities Satan is speaking over the children of God. It's time to live in the light!!

Persepolis

December has been SO crazy. Buuut finals are done and break is here = ). The result is that I will be reading MUCH more. The first book(s) I present to you are Persepolis and Persepolis 2 by Marjane Satrapi. I absolutely recommend these. They are auto-biographical graphic novels from the point of view of an Iranian woman who grew up with during the Islamic Revolution. They were eye-opening and enjoyable. I had never finished a graphic novel before (the only other one I had ever started was The Watchman). I don't even really know how to describe how much perspective these gave me. Seriously just go read them... Or at the very least rent the movie. So good!!

The Robinsons

My church (Antioch Community Church Norman) has a training school called Equip. It's an incredible 10 months of well.. equipping one for a life of ministry. This year a couple with three kids decided to join. They asked me to babysit and I have had SO MUCH FUN getting to know these kids. Seriously, Monday is one of my favorite nights of the week. I love these kids with my whole stinkin' heart. I thought I'd share some of my pictures with them!


Jade and I at her 2nd grade program.


Noah wanted in on the fun hahaha


Jade giving a testimony at church with her mom about how she led someone to Christ during recess at school


Noah at his "Shark Attack" soccer game


Noah and his blue mouthwash


Carving pumpkins = )

That Time I Turned 20...

It's hard to believe I'm out of the teens and into the 20s... But it's here. I'm officially 20. I thought I'd share some pictures from my various birthday celebrations this year. Virginia, Cheesecake Factory, Ice Skating party that my roomies planned. It was a good birthday = )



First I celebrated in Virginia with the Reynolds!


Nuryia was pretty stinkin' excited I got Toy Story 3 hahaha


Birthday dinner at Cheesecake Factory with the family! (and Abbey haha)


Ashley Lynch (the girl who disciples me) and I!


Me and the roomies = ) (Koby and Rachel)




Me, Julie, Koby, and Rachel


Pretty much the whole crew = )

Laminin

"And he is before all things, and in him all things hold together." Colossians 1:17

When I first went to see a doctor about my depression, they told me I needed to go buy this video at Mardels and watch it. It changed my life. [Sidenote: I have been SO BLESSED with Christian doctors throughout this stage of my life. WOW.] I think about this video a lot, but today my pastor showed it as part of our series on Colossians. Please watch it and be encouraged. It's INCREDIBLE!!!

The Body of Christ

The body of Christ is beautiful. One of my favorite Bible stories has always been that of Moses having his weary arms held up by his friends Aaron and Hur. What a picture of community! When we get too weary to press on by ourselves, the body is there to help us keep going. I love it. Today at church we got together and held each other's arms up and prayed over each other. Absolutely beautiful. I felt the Spirit sweeping through the auditorium. Abba, thank you for the body of Christ...

Lioness

Thank you to Caroline
[whose blog can be found here ]
for introducing me to this beautiful quote...



'And Aslan turned and said to Lucy, 'If you were any braver, you'd be a lioness.'"
-CS Lewis
[The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe]

Praise Him

I had a beautiful Thanksgiving yesterday. I wanted to take a moment to list many things I'm thankful for- not just today but eternally. Praise be to Him...

1. I'm thankful for the love of God that goes on and on, overwhelming my soul
2. I'm thankful for family that wants to see me find life abundantly
3. I'm thankful for roommates who are always willing to let me vent, hold me while I cry, pray together before bed, and dance- whether its to Kanye or a worship song
4. I'm thankful for old friends whose friendship only grows deeper as the years go on.
5. I'm thankful for new friends who make my life more exciting, teach me new things and bless me daily
6. I'm thankful for my lifegroup that always supports and loves me
7. I'm thankful for my pastor and the other leadership of Antioch
8. I'm thankful for the Robinsons and the time I get to spend with them every Monday
9. I'm thankful for children
10. I'm thankful for the times when I've wanted to give up
11. I'm thankful for hopeless nights
12. I'm thankful for those nights when God met me in my brokenness and spoke hope over me
13. I'm thankful for Ashley who disciples me
14. I'm thankful for Rachel for helping lead me to freedom in Christ
15. I'm thankful for ballet
16. I'm thankful for the work of the Spirit in Norman, at OU, and all around the world
17. I'm thankful for robins
18. I'm thankful for my trip to India
19. I'm thankful that my heart has been broken
20. I'm thankful that I've been restored
21. I'm thankful that I now have a greater capacity to love and empathize
22. I'm thankful for those who are forging new paths in new places for the sake of Christ
23. I'm thankful for my sister who I see growing into a woman of God
24. I'm thankful for my camera
25. I'm thankful for tears
26. I'm thankful for laughter
27. I'm thankful for people who have helped me reach the place I am today- mentors, pastors, teachers and those who led by example
28. I'm thankful for new opportunities
29. I'm thankful to be surrounded by people who I love and who love me- So much more than I deserve
30. I'm thankful for my identity in Christ. I am a new creation. The old is gone. I am loved. I am worthy. I am worth it. No one else can love Him like I can. I am unique. I am called. I am gifted. I am beautiful. I have a mothers heart. I am faithful. I am pure. I can be only good. I carry the presence. I am a light. I am radiant. I'm a steamboat : ) I am loved. I'm a daughter. I capture the Kings heart. HE LOVES ME!!

Praise Him forevermore for HE IS GOOD.
He makes all things work together for good.
He makes everything beautiful in time.
He doesn't call the qualified. He qualifies the called.
Every good and perfect gift comes from Him
PRAISE HIM

I Am A Soul

"You don't have a soul. You ARE a soul. You have a body."
-CS Lewis

I was thinking about this quote yesterday. The implications of it astound me. I feel like I'm often really vague on my blog, but sometimes it's just too hard to put my deepest thoughts into words on a blog. If anyone reads this and has thoughts concerning it. Please share!! For me it changes the way I approach my interactions with others and my priorities. What does it make you stop and think about?

Consequence of the Law

Here's something for you to chew on...

"For by works of the law no human being will be justified in His sight, since through the law comes knowledge of sin." Romans 3:20

"For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.... Then the eys of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked. And they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths. And they heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the gardn. But the Lord God called to the man and said to him, 'Where are you?' And he said, 'I heard the sound of you in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked, and I hid myself.' He said, 'Who told you that you were naked?'" Genesis 3:5,7-11

[to be continued]

Stress and Blessings

Sometimes I've overwhelmed with where I'm heading... Not that I really know where that is BUT let me explain... So many days I miss being a child. The stress level was so low! I think about how I would spend Saturdays (or really everyday) playing computer games, reading, living in one of my imaginary worlds (I still live in some of them when I'm just in need of some good ole imagination), or playing with my toys. How relaxing does that sound?? Breakfast, lunch and dinner was always provided. You got recess. Man, what the life!! I think about how stressful life seems sometimes... Like right now when I'm enrolled in 19 hours, working around 15 hours a week, and trying to spend as much time with my family (both biological and Church) as possible. And then I think about how life is only going to get MORE stressful. That's a scary thought!! Then I stop... And realize that God gives us just what we need whenever we need it. He gives us strength for each day. He gives us friends who help to carry our burdens. He gives us mentors to help guide us. HE GIVES US HIS PRESENCE. He gives us moments of laughter. Peaceful rains. HE GIVES REST FOR THE WEARY. Mmm I'm so blessed by Him. I'm blessed to get to attend the school I do. I'm blessed with a family who loves me. I'm blessed with two amazing roommates. I'm blessed with more friends than I deserve. I'm blessed with a major that's perfect for me. I'm blessed to work with children who show me the love and heart and power of God. I'm blessed to be on this journey with Him... Living in this unbelievable love story. He leads me with cords of kindness (Hosea 11). He's so good. Blessings to anyone who reads this!!

His Lavish Love

Christmas is just around the corner (in 52 days to be exact), and today, God is painting me a beautiful picture of something. Ashley Lynch, who has recently begun discipling me, was asking whether I believed that God had an UNBELIEVABLE FUTURE in store for me. She went on to say that He is sitting on the edge of His seat and can't wait to show me what's next. Goodness gracious, after she said that, God just started speaking all sorts of His excitement to me. Here is the best way I can explain what He was saying to me... You know those kids who are terrible at keeping secrets because they're SO excited to give you the gift they've gotten for you (Yes YOU Chandler)? That's how I see God. GRANTED, He knows how to keep a secret, but He is giddy with excitement to lead you to all that He has prepared. He has a hope and a future. He wants the EXTRAORDINARY. Isn't that great?? It makes ME giddy, too. I hear United Pursuit's prophetic lyrics...

Come Away
by United Pursuit Band

Come away with me
Come away.
It's never too late
It's never too late
It's not too late for you.
I have a plan for you.
I have a plan.
It's gonna be WILD.
It's gonna be GREAT.
It's gonna be FULL OF ME.

Bah!!! I just want to start dancing around here in the library... I'll try to refrain, but isn't that great?! He is SO GOOD!!!!!! How can I even try to focus on anything else when He's distracting me with His goodness?? This love story is the best of all... So I leave you now with a smile on my face hoping my joy has been contagious! Go ask Him to tell you how much He loves you. He's absolutely dying to = )

BEAUTIFUL Realization

Today was... A day to mark down in history. Today my soul was restored in SO many areas. I feel this remarkable peace. One of the most mind-boggling revelations is that God didn't cause my pain. He didn't take him away as punishment. His heart broke along with mine. He ached when He saw my pain. His desire was to hold me and speak TRUE PROMISES that He would make beauty from ashes, joy from mourning, good from evil. These things are truly too amazing for me to soak in. I'm amazed. I feel the shock factor of love.

TODAY...
On October 29, 2010... I found peace. May I never forget this day.

The Bizzell

Whether it's because our internet has been messed up at the house, or it's mid-term so I'm working my tail off, I have been at the library SO much lately. Everyday I've been here for hours. I love studying here though. I'm surrounded by books of all sorts. I can't wrap my mind around how much knowledge this building holds. Mmm as I write that sentence I'm reminded of John 21:25... "THere are so many other things Jesus did. If they were all written down, each of them, one by one, I can't imagine a world big enough to hold such a library of books." Is that good or what?! Wow that gives context to the rows and rows, and floors and floors of books I'm surrounded by. I've learned not to study on the floor that houses all the literary books. I can get caught up in all the poetry and studies of the authors. SO I've placed myself in the upper corner of the library where few people dare to come = ). It's in the science section so I'm not nearly as tempted hah! I love college campuses. Today I've worked my butt off at ballet, studied for Pre-Calc and Spanish, had lunch with a friend, chatted with a Latin teacher, run into my sweet roomie at her Health Hut and had a nice little chat, taken a Spanish test, had a chai tea latte, and now am working on an annotated bibliography of an article about Christina Rossetti's "Goblin Market." Good stuff. I'm getting really into my study of "Goblin Market." In fact, I think I've decided to write a close reading on the poem as well as write my final paper on it. I find it THAT interesting. There's just so much to go into and give my opinion on!! I love it. Well there's just a quick look into my life lately. It had been a while so I decided to update all of you in the blogosphere = )

The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo

Wow. Just put down this book after finishing it. It was incredible. It deals with some rough topics, but if you're up for it, I recommend. Written by Swedish author, Steig Larsson, it's original Swedish title was "Men Who Hate Women." It's a mystery that deals heavily with sadism. I had been tipped by someone that it was going to be hard to read because of the content. Halfway through I thought that they must be wrong, but then the plot line really got going. Larsson was a fantastic writer. His format is intriguing and keeps you interested.

Basic plotline (without any spoilers)... Mikael Blomkvist is hired by Henrik Vanger, head of a major Swedish corporation that has long been family owned and run. He is given the job of writing a biography on the Vanger family, while secretly looking into (and attempting to solve) the mystery of what happened to Henrik's niece Harriet who had disappeared 40 years before. As Blomkvist goes about his job, he finds it goes much deeper than anyone ever imagined.

The style reminded me a lot of Dan Brown's writing style, except Larsson deals with much heavier topics (and doesn't stir up trouble with bogus claims). It gets you thinking and forces you to address some things that happen around the world every day. I'm looking forward to reading the next book in the series, "The Girl Who Played With Fire". So there's that!

A Beautiful Inheritance

It's absolutely astounding how much one's life can change in just one year... It blows my mind away. I keep wanting to reiterate that in 28 different ways, but I'll stop. This day, 1 year ago, I thought would change my life forever. Perhaps it did. Just not in the way I expected it to. My verse for this month has been Psalm 16:5-6 specifically for this day. It says...

"The Lord is my chosen portion and my cup; you hold my lot. The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance."

I LOVE this verse. In the past year, I have gone through some of, if not the HARDEST things I've yet experienced. But I've chosen the Lord. HE is my portion. He is my sustenance. He gets me through each day. He's broken my heart with His love. He's taken me through the fire but not let me be burned. He's only refined me. It also says He holds my lot. MY LOT-- all the uncertainties, all the gambles, all the hidden things-- He has them ALL taken care of!! And the most beautiful part of it all? Each night as the dust begins to settle, I see where the lines have fallen and I can say that they have fallen in PLEASANT PLACES. I have the BEAUTIFUL inheritance. He is good. All of Him is everything my heart can desire.

Yes, this year has been hard, but I wouldn't ask to change it if I was given the option. I am confident that all of this is for my good. It is for my best. His love never fails. He's my Shepherd. My Love. And I am His...

My Sweet Community

One of the biggest blessings God has given me this past year was the community I found within Antioch Community Church. I can not say enough good things about the people I have met there and the leadership of the church. We recently moved from Sooner Theater to the Norman North performing arts center. Here are some pictures of our first Sunday along with some sweet times with my lifegroup so far this year = )


Koby and Heatherrrr

I don't know... Rachel being Rachel?

Bo being the Antioch poster child

Me and Julie!


Heather and Kevin making pancakes and eggs at Lifegroup = )

It was really cool because our lifegroup played kickball one Saturday and some other people joined us. That's Acts 2:42-27 in action = )



Jenny and Payton

Blue Genes

EVERYONE NEEDS TO READ THIS BOOK.

I'm serious about this. It's an easy read and it sheds SO MUCH light on the issue of God, the church, and mental illness. It deals with anything from depression, bipolar disorder, ADHD, and even dreams. It was so eye-opening. I can't talk enough about this book. PLEASE everyone... Order this book and read it. Man... So good...

My Roomies

Thought it was about time to introduce you to my sweet roommates Koby and Rachel. They mean the world to me, and I am blessed beyond belief to be living with them this year. That's all for now but I wanted to share this picture and give a quick introduction! = )

Restorer of All Things

I was studying Joel this morning and God really rocked me with this verse. Building up to it God has sent two plagues of locusts to get the Israelites' attention. Then after telling them to repent, He says...

"I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten, the hopper, the destroyer, and the cutter, my great army, which I sent among you. You shall eat in plenty and be satisfied, and praise the name of the Lord your God, who has dealt wondrously with you... In those days I will pour out my Spirit." (Joel 2:25-26,29)

HE RESTORES ALL THINGS. Is this rocking you?? Every moment that seems wasted by trials, every pain that makes no sense, every night you spent crying- HE WILL RESTORE TO YOU. So praise His Name and be satisfied. He has dealt WONDROUSLY and He is pouring His Spirit out on you!! Live in that truth!

The Power of Words and the Wonder of God

Despite my crazy schedule, I've managed to finish another book that I will share with you all! I stumbled across it in the Second Baptist bookstore when I was in Houston visiting the Harrisons. It is a series of lectures given at a "Desiring God" conference that occurred in 2008 or 2009 I believe. Desiring God is a ministry run by John Piper whom I'm sure many of you have heard of. Anyway, each lecture focuses on some aspect of our words and how they relate to God. There are only 6 lectures- some which I enjoyed immensely and others which I honestly skimmed/skipped over. However, I'll try to give a brief synopsis of each...

(1.) "War of Words: Getting to the Heart for God's Sake" by Paul David Tripp

This lecture convicted me in a way I was in desperate need of convicting. Tripp points out that nothing you say wasn't already in your heart. We can't use the excuse that we didn't mean it because the Bible clearly states that the words of our mouth originate in our heart. He also knocks down the excuse that the problem isn't OUTSIDE us but INSIDE us. We always try to blame our words and actions on everyone and everything around us. He encourages you to make this "essential confession" of: "I am my greatest communication problem. The greatest difficulty, the greatest danger, and the everyday traps of communication that we all fall into all exist inside of me, not outside of me." He goes on to compare the Kingdom of God and the Kingdom of Self along with the anger that can be produced from each on separately. He is brutally honest about the effect our words can have on others- to build up or break down, sometimes permanently. He ends encouraging us to pray each day saying, "God, I'm a man (woman) in desperate need of help this morning. I pray in your grace that you would send your helpers my way. And I pray that you would give me the humility to receive the help that comes."

His lecture was engaging, convicting, and well written. Definitely in my top three favorite (possibly my very favorite actually).

(2.) "The Bit, the Bridle, and the Blessing: An Exposition of James 3:1-12" by Sinclair B. Ferguson

I don't believe I finished this one. It was in some ways getting at the same point as the above lecture, but it came at it differently. Once again two main points really got my attention...

"How we use our tongues provides clear evidence of where we are spiritually."

"Words can consume and destroy a life."

Yes, those two sentences are enough to make me be silent for a day. Man, break me Lord. May the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be pleasing to you!!

(3.) "Is There Christian Eloquence? Clear Words and the Wonder of the Cross" by John Piper

This lecture was very good for a certain audience. It was originally given to a room of pastors (i.e. the certain audience). It compares both historically and Biblically the different methods of preaching, and brings up the question of whether one should focus on eloquence.

(4.) "How Sharp the Edge? Christ, Controversy, and Cutting Words" by Mark Driscoll

In the style of Driscoll, he provides a clear and upfront point of view. He outlines how to deal with the sheep, wolves, swine, and dogs of a congregation. He's famous for his "in your face" style, and he is no different in this lecture. That's something I (and many others) really appreciate about him though. He draws from Scripture along with historical figures such as Luther to make the point that we are not meant to gloss everything over. Sometimes we are called to rebuke others, and that doesn't just mean quietly. Sometimes it requires harshness and perhaps even mocking or harsh language (as is sometimes seen in the Bible). I know there is no way I will do his message justice without saying something he never meant so I encourage you to read this one! Like his other works, it will provide for some laughs. So relax and enjoy it but take it seriously as well! One quote that really stuck for me was "Discernment is knowing what time it is. Courage is doing what the time requires." Love it.

(5.) "Story-shaped Faith" by Daniel Taylor

A literary point of view of faith. Something I can really respect as a fellow appreciator of literature and the story form. He argues that you can make the proposition that "God is powerful" (etc..) but without a story that shows that statement to be true, it will hold little power.

"Belief is a whole-body, whole-life experience. No one believes anything important with the intellect alone... Reason is a powerful tool, bit it is a tool that will serve any master, including the most odoious. We do well to reason as clearly as we can, but we are foolish to pretend that reason alone or any other, single mental function can tell us what is true. what is important what to believe, or how to live... Stories and propositions need each other. Each provides a limit that the other must respect-- a kind of mutual check."

He argued many other really great points. I really enjoyed his lecture. But I can't hit on ALL the good stuff they all said...

(6.) "Words of Wonder: What Happens When We Sing" by Bob Kauflin

I'm sorry to say that I'm just getting a little bored with writing this BUT this was also a great lecture. He covers the importance of music and singing in the church. It's great... But really it is...



So all this to say.... It was a pretty interesting book... Sorry I've gotten so apathetic by the end of this!!

Undivided Heart

As I sit to write this post, my heart is full of so many emotions! First, I am still overwhelmed with joy over how much fun it was to get to have Chandler, Alex, Nicole, Jake, Spence, Evan, Hunter, Kaci, Lindy and SO MANY MORE with me at church this morning. I LOVE my community and it makes me giddy to share it with others = )

At church this morning, my pastor, Chris Bennett, spoke on loving God. Man, did the Spirit use it to get to a crevice of my heart that needed getting at!! I'm going to hit on a few points that really got to me BUT if you want to listen, go to the following link (if it's not up, it will be soon... It's called "Four Loves").

(1.) "2 I know your works, your toil and your patient endurance, and how you cannot bear with those who are evil, but have tested those who call themselves apostles and are not, and found them to be false. 3 I know you are enduring patiently and bearing up for my name's sake, and you have not grown weary. 4 But I have this against you, that you have abandoned the love you had at first. 5 Remember therefore from where you have fallen; repent, and do the works you did at first. If not, I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place, unless you repent" (Revelation 2:2-5)

In this passage, Christ is talking to the church of Ephesus. He tells them that He sees all the amazing things they are doing for the Kingdom BUT they have forgotten their first love. We exist to MAKE THE LOVE OF GOD KNOWN. We can get so caught up doing good things and going about our good business, surrounding ourselves with other likeminded people, that we forget to focus on our LOVE and our PURPOSE.

Why does this happen? We claim to love Him and do all the right things, but where do we go wrong??

(2.) "Teach me your way, O Lord, that I may walk in your truth; unite my heart to fear your name." (Psalm 86:11)

UNITE my heart to fear your name... Make my heart UNDIVIDED towards You.... We may love Him sincerely but also love a list of other things that divides our love for Him. Our question should always be, "Does this help me love God more??" We love God, but become far too easily pleased and content because of our love for other things!!

I know that for me, I get so caught up in my love for other things (books, music, movies, etc) that I'm willing to divide my love and live in the gray... An area that doesn't necessarily help me to love God more.


So the question must be asked, Does my life reflect my confession of loving Him with my whole heart as Deuteronomy 6:4-9 and numerous other passages command? If not, how can I increase my outward expression of my love for Him?? Firstly through obedience as John 14:15 says. Second, starting my day in His presence!! If I start my day with anything other than Him, a million things will get my attention and divide my heart. Starting my day with Him, helps me to start my day with a heart undivided in my love.

A good thing to remember:
Anything I want to do for God will come out of intimacy with Him (John 15:5)

Lord give me a heart of flesh in the areas that have been hardened by a divided heart (Ezekiel 11:18-20)! May I walk out in that love. May I bind it to my heart and may it drip from my mouth as I go about my day! Let it be!!

The Little Prince

I've been looking forward to writing my first blog post about a book. I'm warning you this isn't from the list I previously posted. If you know me well or you continue to follow this, you will learn I'm not very good at following lists of books. I am generally reading around 5 at once and many I never intended to read yet. So here I am presenting a lovely book that I have previously not mentioned. It's a children's book called The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry. If you have never read it- PLEASE DO. I feel like too often we feel like we get to an age that children's literature is no longer for us. I will shamelessly admit that it is my favorite genre. Sometimes I want to pretend I like other genres more (after all I AM in college where everyone has big dreams and aspirations, what kind of person prefers to read children's books and just wants to open a bookstore? ME) but I can't lie, children's books are without a doubt my favorite. One of my best friends gave me this book for Christmas last year with a great inscription in it. (Aren't inscriptions the best??) But anyhow, he asked me recently if I'd read it yet and I realized I hadn't! So for the past week it has been my bubble bath/bedtime read. Here are three things you should know about the book...

(1.) It is a children's book all about childhood. It has the same feeling as Where the Wild Things Are except it is more eloquent, was written a number of decades earlier, and it is much longer.

(2.) The illustrations are BEAUTIFUL


"In order to make his escape, I believe he took advantage of a migration of wild birds."

(3) It was originally written in French by a pilot for the French air force who was shot down over the Mediterranean ocean a year later by a German plane.

Lastly, allow me to leave you with the dedication in the book. It just makes me smile and shows the heart of Saint-Exupéry's work...

"TO LEON WERTH
I ask children to forgive me for dedicating this book to a grown-up. I have a serious excuse: this grown-up is the best friend I have in the world. I have another excuse: this grown-up can understand everything, even books for children. I have a third excuse: he lives in France where he is hungry and cold. He needs to be comforted. If all these excuses are not enough, then I want to dedicate this book to the child whom this grown-up once was. All grown-ups were children first. (but few of them remember it.) So I correct my dedication:
TO LEON WERTH
when he was a little boy..."

Absolutely beautiful. If you never have... PLEASE go pick this up. Find a quiet place where you can allow yourself to think like a child and soak up this wonderful story...

What Possibilities!

Yesterday at church, my pastor, Chris Bennett, gave us all a little history lesson concerning OU. In 1892, when the first president of OU arrived at the site where the school would be, he looked at the open land (which then contained no trees) and said, "What possibilities!" A devout Christian man, he set up a daily voluntary chapel for the students. Each service was very short. Generally it just contained a couple of songs and a three minute devotion. However, after one devotion about the parable of the sower, an artist created this statue for the school...



It eventually it became part of the school seal, and is an icon on campus. However, so few people know why it's there! The statue represents the seeds of the gospel being sown all around campus. This is the time. This is the year. We see a generation rising up to take there place. We see a near revival stirring as we pray and seek! Join us by praying for our campus. Pray that every believer may rise up, full of fire and spread the good Word. Pray for open hearts! God is so good and I can't wait to see what He's going to do this year and in the years to come! He looks at this city and says "What possibilities!!" We join Him in that declaration.

Yesterday, a large group from my church made up of all ages, met on campus corner. We worshipped there for a while (I'm sure people were so confused) then we walked all the way around campus Jericho style praying over the campus. When we were done we shared our visions for what God was going to do. We prayed over them. Then they had all of the students get in the middle and they just bathed us in prayer. What a blessing!! I am so thankful for the body God has placed all around me. I am blessed, blessed, blessed. Well, off to my first day of sophomore year! Fuego de Dios!

What He's Been Showing Me Lately...

This is a very interesting stage in my life but God is showing me some great things through it. Here are some of them...

1. There is a time for EVERYTHING.

I know I come back to this concept time and time again, but it just never ceases to speak to me. Right now it is encouraging to me because in the past God called me to remove some things- good things even- from my life so that I may go to the wilderness that He may speak tenderly to me as in the days of my youth (Hosea 2). Ecclesiastes 3 is a promise that God is going to renew those areas of my life in His perfect timing. For now, there is nothing better than to "be joyful and to do good" and remember that "He has made everything beautiful in its time." (Ecc. 3:12, 11)

2. He brings us to the wilderness to prepare us for His plan

Throughout the Bible there are examples of this. Moses is a prime example. He fled to the desert. There he was a shepherd. While the Bible doesn't give a lot of specifications of those years in the desert, I know God was preparing him for the day "I AM" would approach him and speak his destiny over him. I feel like I'm in the desert right now. Not in the sense that my life is dry but that I'm in a time of preparation. I refuse to rush through this season, but also look forward to what my future holds... All His ways and plans are perfect. He is the Author and Perfecter of all things.

3. He gives us talents so that we may prove our faithfulness

I keep looking at that sentence because I'm not sure I said that right. However, hopefully you will know what I mean. We must be stewards of small things before we can be stewards over more. The Lord asked me to step back from some of the things I was stewarding. Now we're starting over again on a much smaller scale. Sometimes I want to jump ahead, but I know this will help me to be much more faithful in the small things and over bigger things when they come. I'm thankful for everything He gives me to steward right now. May I always be grateful for such...

4. He reminds me of His faithfulness when I most need it.

Little example. Today I started a new job. I was moderately excited for this job... Well, mostly for the pay which I expected to be good. However, today turned out to be a very long day during which I made a total of around $15. Slightly discouraging to say the least. So I'm standing in Andy's Alligators in my neon yellow Party Pics polo typing out a text to my mom saying that I wish there was someone in the sorority I was taking pictures of that I knew so it wouldn't be so awkward when a girl walks up, reminds me of her name, and says she goes to Antioch. I just had to smile. Thanks God. Little things like that remind me that you are with me in the mediocre. You never leave my side.

5. Sometimes God doesn't work the way we think He would.

God has a perfect character. Of that, I have no doubt. However, I am convinced that He works in ways we don't/can't understand. I've been thinking a lot about that fact and sin. I have very much been thinking lately about whether His plan for us sometimes involves sin. I'm not sure if I'll be able to make myself clear, but I wonder if... Well it's a tricky tightrope between God allowing us to sin and causing us to sin/tempting us to sin. I believe He never causes us to sin or tempts us to sin. I'm just not sure I'll ever understand, but I am confident that His plan for us often involves the dark places. What that means, I can't say. But through the darkest places, I know He holds our hands and sees the light at the end of the tunnel even when we can't. He sees the good that will come from it- the wisdom we'll be able to pass along, the hurts we'll be able to help others through, and the habits we'll be able to help others avoid. A great verse to illustrate that is Psalm 37:23-24... "The steps of a man are established by the Lord, when he delights in His way; though he fall, he shall not be cast headlong, for the Lord upholds his hand."

"The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases, His mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. 'The Lord is my portion,' says my soul, 'therefore I will hope in Him.' The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, to the soul who seeks Him." Lamentations 3:22-25

"Trust in the Lord, and do good; dwell in the land and befriend faithfulness. Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him, and He will act." Psalms 37:3-5

Coming Soon...

I try to read regularly... No, correction, I'm really always reading something. However, it seems that I never get as much as I want read. I try not to get overwhelmed with the enormous list of books I want to read and just enjoy what's in my hands at the time. Nevertheless, here is a list of some up and coming books. I'll write little "reviews" as I cross them off the list....


Currently reading:



It's a classic. Somehow I've never read this series, so here we go. I'm halfway through this one and then will continue on to the "Lord of the Rings"...


Up and Coming:


I've heard it's fantastic. REALLY looking forward to this one...



If there's a man from the Bible who understood forgiveness, I say it was without a doubt Joseph. I want to study this man and learn to forgive as he did...



I know close to nothing about this book. However, it seems to be an up and coming series. I'd like to figure out what it's all about.


Every now and then I try to read a solid graphic novel. I watched this movie and really enjoyed it. Therefore, this is the next graphic novel on my list...


I want more of you Jesus...



I've heard that this is a fantastic answer to a growing problem. I live in a confused society. I desire as much wisdom in this area as I can get.


Well... That's what's coming soon. I'm excited!

Life...

...Is good. I'm so lacking in words for it right now. I feel suspended. I'm content and yet have a deep longing. I just want to sit in His presence and let Him explain what I'm feeling. I'm reminded of my heartsong from senior year. The words once again resonate deep within me...

I need words
As wide as sky
I need language large as
This longing inside
And I need a voice
Bigger than mine
And I need a song to sing You
That I've yet to find
I need You,
Oh, I need You
I need You,
Oh, I need You
To be here now
To be here now
To hear me now
To hear me now

"I Need Words"
David Crowder

That's all for now. I'm gonna go soak up some life from the Lover of my soul... He's so good to me. It amazes me yet never enough...

To Chew On...

"A sure sign of the Holy Spirit's working is that Christ is magnified- not other people."
-Francis Chan

Oklahoma Sports Hall of Fame Banquet

Every year my dad sponsors the Oklahoma Sports Hall of Fame banquet. For the first time in a while, it worked out for my whole family to go this year! Keypoints included Troy Aikman being inducted and giving a speech, Don Demeter's friend giving a hilarious speech, and my dad's brand new speech (He's stuck with the same one for the past 6 years). My dad was on a roll. Those moments are always nerve-wracking for my mom, sister and I. Even if we think it's funny, we never know how everyone else is going to react! But it seemed to go pretty well. Great job Daddy = ) Here are some pics from the night!!



Mikayla, Me, Chan


My hair. Not gonna lie, I was pretty proud of myself for creating this!!




Chan's hair (Creation of Mom)


My sweet cousin, Mikayla!




Dad flashin' a smile out at the audience hahah


Troy Aikman giving his speech


Me and the fam fam

This Time for Africa

Yesterday I went and hung out with my previous roomie Lindy Green. Man, I LOVE HER! I'm so glad we roomed together last year. I'm gonna miss her this year, no doubt, but I'm glad we grew so close last year. So anyway, as usual she helped catch me up on Pop Culture. I'm always so behind = ) But she showed me a video to a song that sounded familiar but am not sure where I heard it. Regardless, this video really moved me. It's called "Waka Waka" by Shakira and it has clips from the previous World Cup. I LOVE IT. Not only is it full of clips of soccer but it shows the beauty of the sport. It brings countries together. It brings the world together. Oh how I wish that the US was more into soccer. Maybe I should move to another country = ) Ok well I'll let the video speak for itself. This time for Africa = )

Laughter

Tonight I was overwhelmed by how much God has poured His laughter over me this week. I was eating dinner with the lovely Lindsay Rae Robinson at Iron Starr BBQ in OKC when it hit me-- it was the second time this week I had found myself in that restaurant laughing until tears were pouring down my cheeks. I really don't have much to say about that other than, thank you Jesus! Thank you for friends who I can live in joy with! Thank you for meals that fill my mouth with laughter and cause my heart to overflow. You are GOOD!

"He will yet fill your mouth with laughter, and your lips with shouting." Job 8:21

"Then our mouth was filled with laughter, and our tongue with shouts of joy; then they said among the nations, “The Lord has done great things for them.” Psalm 126:2

"And Sarah said, “God has made laughter for me; everyone who hears will laugh over me.” Genesis 21:6

May everyone see my life and laugh at how God has so taken care of me! What was foolish to the world He has transformed! May it only point to Him!!

Perfect Sunset

Yesterday Koby let me tag along to Weatherford with her. I had SUCH good time. After dinner we went out to one of her favorite spots between Weatherford and Clinton. It's called White Horse Hill I believe? But I could have gotten that a little wrong. We were going to have dinner there, but there were two rehearsal dinners, so the owner said he couldn't fit us in but we could come back for sweet tea and the sunset. That was good enough for me!! I caught some pictures of it that I just had to share. I hope you enjoy!





[If you want to see any of my other photography, you can go to makenzihargrovephotography.blogspot.com]